Nothing is more damning than a lousy excuse. In the workplace, it is more common than I think. Being a department head, I manage a set of employees. And everytime our HR calls my attention why this employee is late or absent, I have to tell them the real reason. And everytime I do this, it just got on your nerves the way they present their reasons. Below are some examples.
1. “Na-traffic po ako.” = Traffic is not force majeure, so don’t make it an excuse! It’s irritating, most especially if this is the only reason everytime someone goes tardy.
2. “Wala po kasing tubig sa’min, di po ako nakaligo kagad.” = If you went to the office without taking a bath, your officemates wouldn’t know! Why would you waste one day of your salary?
3. “LBM.” The most overused excuse for going absent! In fact, it has morphed with a new meaning “Looking for Better Management.” If an employee reasons this out, you better tell him/her to go find a better employer who can handle his/her attitude better.
4. “Personal po eh.” Another pet peeved. Personal means “highly classified” that it cannot be divulge. Yeah, right. Maybe you got cured from STD.
5. “Na flat tire po yung motor ko eh.” This is the common excuse of employees with motorcycles. So what now, I will blame your motorcycle and not you? Moron.
6. “Tinanghali po kasi ako ng gising.” Buy alarm clock.
7. “Not feeling well.” Pambihira, iniinsulto mo ba dunong ko?
8. “Nasira po kasi MRT.” Then, let’s issue memo to MRT, and suspend MRT.
Some reasons are so believable that they border absurdity.
9. “Yun po kasing jeep na sinusundan ko may nabangga sa harap nya, tapos hindi kagad ako nakapag preno so natumba po ako. Pahilot ko lang po muna kamay ko.” Too good to be true. Funny.
10. “Tinulungan ko pong dalhin sa ospital yung mama na nabudol ng sasakyan sa daan.” Wow, kind-hearted.
11. “Wala po kasi akong masakyan. Siksikan at punu-an po.”
12. “Pinatawag po ako ng principal sa school, may konting problema lang po anak ko.” Bully yata anak mo.
13. “Wala pong magbabantay ng anak kung maliit, may pinuntahan lang po kasi mga magulang ko.”
14. “May lagnat po ako.” Fever is a symptom. So what really is wrong with you why you caught fever?
15. “May pinuntahan lang po.” Yeah, right. Hell?
Excuses is a reflection of our failure to discipline our selves. And people with no self-discipline, they go nowhere. Come on, plant discipline now so you can harvest it later. You have to start from something.